Become a Pro at Talking Dirty & Sounding Sexy

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Sign up for our newsletter; you’ll gain access to exclusive insights and updates. Dirty talk, when done correctly, can be a huge turn-on. There’s nothing like hearing exactly what your partner wants to do to you and how they’d like to do it, or hearing them compliment you on your intimate bits. Ask your partner what they’ve always fantasized about, and then pick a time to bring it to life. This can even be done before you hit the sheets, where the two of you meet out at a bar and pretend not to know each other.

Sexy sayings when you’re pleasuring your partner orally

Then place your personal touch, including moans, groans, and the ubiquitous “YEAH?! YEAH!!” exchange to make your sexual talk genuinely resonate. Reminisce about some of your hottest moments with your partner and how you’d like to recreate them. Recalling a night of pleasure is excellent for moments of writer’s block when you want to send a sexy text but can’t think of what to say. By calling up these memories, you’re expressing appreciation and desire for regular sex with your partner, and that’s hot. Whether you’re having phone sex for the first time or you’re in a long-distance relationship, here are some dirty things to say when you’re virtually connecting with someone.

• If you’re in a brand new relationship or with a new partner and haven’t talked dirty to one another before, you might not feel sure about how to start engaging in it.
• At first, the simple act of opening your mouth and letting these words fall out can feel like standing on the edge of a cliff.
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• Eye them now, copy and paste, repeat, or read them your boo later.
• If he responds positively in the bedroom, send him a dirty message the next day, or tell him something kinky over coffee in the morning.

Conversations That Make Hearts Race

In the bedroom, when someone says “Talk dirty to me baby…” the hopefully-soon-to-be dirty talker suddenly freezes up like a soaking wet roll of toilet paper thrown out of an igloo in Antartica. While some things may offend your partner(s), other comments might be just plain confusing. A friend of mine had a fling with a man a few years ago and in the heat of the moment, he moaned, “Ohhh yeah, you’re 21.” My friend was a hard 29 at the time. While this fantasy was of perfectly-legal drinking age, it was still a head-scratcher.

“Feeling you on top of me and in control is the hottest thing ever!”

The best seductive language is the kind that comes naturally to you. But it can sometimes be tough to think straight when your mind is occupied by, um, other things — so feel free to slip a few of these freaky things to say into your back pocket. Learning how to talk dirty should be fun, so try to relax and go with the flow. Building from a slow burn also applies to tone of voice, which is so important when talking dirty. “Try talking really slowly and sensually, whispering naughty words into your partner’s ear, and accentuating words like ‘hard,’ ‘wet,’ and ‘lips.’ That will really get your partner going! Dirty talk can be an exciting way to get creative and engage your brain in sex!

” “What if I ruin the mood by laughing because it just sounds so ridiculous? ” Manta says she hears anxious concerns like these all the time in the field. When you’re mastering the art of how to talk dirty, you might feel silly at first—just know that you’ll survive and gradually get more comfortable with the sensation of feeling awkward. It’s worth noting that some people genuinely enjoy and prefer silence during sex, and that’s okay too. Dr. Jansen has come across such cases in her practice. But if you have a timid lover who is interested in talking dirty but isn’t sure where to start, you can help them venture out of their comfort zone by teeing up opportunities for them to follow your lead.

Knowing which dirty things to say to a girl to turn her on will be useful for so many reasons. The next time you want to make her yours in the bedroom, try a few of these. Bringing new things into your sex life can not only improve your evening.

This also helps if you’re still feeling a little shy, since it’s often easier to whisper something than to say it out loud (not to mention the fact that apartment walls can be pretty damn thin). There are plenty of lists online there with sexy phrases you can use during sex to up the dirty talk. But aside from the fact that you might get stage fright and struggle to remember them in the heat of the moment, if such phrases feel unnatural or forced, they’re likely not going to feel sexy.

This is where the flirting gets more specifically sexual. If foreplay is a new concept to you, start by reading our Foreplay all Day Long post or our Fun Foreplay post for more specific ideas! For our purposes here, foreplay is the part of dirty talk where you start exploring sexually. Consider what things you have done or want to do sexually that really get you going. Think them through on your own, and then when you’re comfortable message or tell your spouse what they do that’s sexy!